The Complete Book of 2000s Broadway Musicals by Dan Dietz

Author:Dan Dietz [Dietz, Dan]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Rowman & Littlefield Publishers
Published: 2017-03-20T16:00:00+00:00

2005–2006 Season

THE BLONDE IN THE THUNDERBIRD

“A One-Woman Musical Joyride”

Theatre: Brooks Atkinson Theatre

Opening Date: July 17, 2005; Closing Date: July 23, 2005

Performances: 9

Material: Mitzie and Ken Welch

Lyrics and Music: See list of musical numbers for specific credits

Based on the books Keeping Secrets (1988) and After the Fall (1998) by Suzanne Somers.

Direction: Mitzie and Ken Welch; Producer: Alan Hamel; Scenery and Lighting: Roger Ball; Costume: The one outfit worn by Suzanne Somers during the evening doesn’t seem to have been credited to a particular designer; Musical Direction: Doug Walter

Cast: Suzanne Somers

The solo show was presented in one act.

Musical Numbers

“The Blonde in the Thunderbird” (lyric and music by Mitzie and Ken Welch); “Fifty Percent” (Ballroom, 1978; lyric by Marilyn and Alan Bergman, music by Billy Goldenberg); “How Do I Say I Love You” (lyric and music by Mitzie and Ken Welch); “If I Could Live It Over Again” (lyric and music by Mitzie and Ken Welch); “If I Only Had a Brain” (1939 film The Wizard of Oz; lyric by E. Y. Harburg, music by Harold Arlen); “If You Knew Susie” (interpolated into Big Boy, 1925; lyric by B. G. “Buddy” DeSylva, music by Joseph Meyer); “Inventory” (lyric and music by Mitzie and Ken Welch); “Johnny’s Theme” (music by Paul Anka and Johnny Carson); “Langston’s Reel” (music by Celtic Fiddle Festival); “No More Secrets” (lyric and music by Mitzie and Ken Welch); “Pick Yourself Up” (1936 film Swing Time; lyric by Dorothy Fields, special lyric by Mitzie and Ken Welch, music by Jerome Kern); “Repartee” (from the 2002 recording The Underground Sounds of Holland; lyric and music by Kenneth Doekhie and Jaimy); “Self Portrait” (Urban Blight, 1988; later used in A Class Act, 2001; lyric and music by Edward Kleban); “She Loves Me” (She Loves Me, 1963; lyric by Sheldon Harnick, music by Jerry Bock); “Take Back Your Mink” (Guys and Dolls, 1950; lyric and music by Frank Loesser); “That Face” (lyric and music by Alan Bergman and Lew Spence); “The Phil Donahue Show Theme” (music by Frank Vincent Malfa); “Wake Up, Little Susie” (lyric and music by Boudleaux Bryant and Felice Bryant)

Suzanne Somers’s one-woman show The Blonde in the Thunderbird received the most savage reviews of the decade, cut short its engagement by some six weeks, and closed after nine performances. Presumably Broadway prices didn’t attract Somers’s fan base from her television sitcom years of Three’s Company, her appearances on the Home Shopping Network, and her best-selling self-help books (such as Suzanne Somers’ Eat, Cheat and Melt the Fat Away and 365 Ways to Change Your Life). The production was reportedly capitalized at $1.6 million, but Somers’s husband and the show’s producer Alan Hamel told Variety he estimated the total cost would top out at $4 million.

The show, which included songs and incidental music, was essentially an autobiographical evening in which Somers discussed the highs and lows of her personal and professional lives, and like so many celebrities of her ilk she perhaps shared more than her audience really wanted to know.

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